Free iPhone Apps shakedown

A few months ago, I made a list of some iPhone Apps I thought were pretty cool, even though I don't actually use any of them. After a bit over 1-year of iPhoneage, there are the FREE apps I now use regularly, for different reasons (I only use free apps, because I'm that way). I thought I would give them a brief mention:

• Facebook - What else is there to say- it's Facebook.
  
• Free RSS Reader - An, um, free RSS reader? supports images. Awkward learning curve but once you figure it out its quite handy.
  
• WifiSpeed (web app)- Bandwidth measuring device. Because sometimes I'm just curious
  
• Remote (by Apple)- You mean you don't have this app yet?! Control your iTunes Desktop app from your phone.
  
• Flickr Sendr - upload cellphone pics straight into your Flickr account. Note: Resizes your photos, but simple to use.
  
• Lose it - Log and track your caloric intake. Largest library of products I've seen in a free app, Plus you can add your own.

There aren't all the apps I've collected at this point, but the others I don't use enough to formulate a recommendation at this time. :)

QUESTION: Any one know of an app that monitors/logs which apps you use the most/least?

How to get a free iPhone, apparently.

I was listening to Leo Laporte (techguylabs.com, twit.tv) today and he brokedown how to get a deal on the iPhone if you are an existing customer... (In my opinion this trick should work with any phone company, but this discussion was specifically in regard to the iPhone).

- Call Customer Service (611 for AT&T subscribers) and tell them you're going to go to [insert competing phone company]

- You say you like AT&Ts services but because you don't want to pay full price to switch to the iPhone, and therefore you would like to cancel your service.

- Eventually they will forward you to a "Customer Retention Specialist". (their job is specifically this- to retain customers). You repeat the same story and he/she will try a bunch of different deals, and eventually, make you an offer you can live with. If the CRS doesn't give you a deal, then politely end the conversation, hang up, call again and start over until you get a CRS that will work with you.

Why does this work? Why, money of course! The $2000 a year they make off of you is worth giving up a $200-300 discount on a phone. According to Leo Laporte, that is.

So, try it, and let me know if it works!

Before YouTube?!?!

This might only be funny to me:

Today a student was trying to play a DVD on the PCs in my computer lab. When it didn't work he asked for help....

Me: They set the machines up so they won't play DVD's because they dont want people in here watching movies all day

Student: Y'all can't watch no YouTube in here?

Me: This was before YouTube

Student: Before YouTube?!?!

I was about to say, "yes, you know there was a time before YouTube, right?" But that would violate my don't talk smack to a big giant black guy policy.

Job Reference

A former employee left me a voicemail over the weekend (paraphrased):

"...I put you down as a reference... I didn't necessarily lie on my application, but I did stretch out a few things and just wanted to give you a heads up..."

Only, he didn't mention what he "stretched", so what good did that do? I guess this is what happens when you develop an excellent rapport with your employees and eventually they leave.

Since I've got you here... (ITC nightmare)

Sometimes I hate myself. That is to say, I hate how nice I am when I don't need to be.

Yesterday I somehow* had a couple non-clients wander/corner/trap me in my office, with a series of questions concerning nothing that has anything to do with my job description, services, or expertise. Not only are they not clients, but aren't even qualified to *be* a client (long story). They must have gotten stuck in their quest to get rich quick, and since it involves a computer, they found the biggest room full of computers they could locate (I guess. Still trying to figure that one out actually).

I have minimal experience with web-based affiliate programs, and from a user perspective, frankly I hate them! Unfortunately, their problem was simple to figure out, and not even their fault. (out of date instructions are sometimes worsee than no instructions.) I was able to figure out the "fix" pretty easily, next thing you know, I'm helping to make the Internet just little less useful. Sorry folks. Then it comes:

Well, hey- Since I've got you here...

45 minutes later... Yeah 45! they finally they leave. That was one of the most aggravating, annoying consultations to date, and I didn't get a consultant fee! But at least I'm done with them. Or am I? [insert omninous music]


About 5 minutes ago I got a phone call and can you guess who is on the other end? Yeah- one of my non-clients! He must have grabbed my business card when I wasn't looking, and secured access to my direct line!

SUNUVA!!...

Again the questions were basic and solutions were simple. The worst part- this guy is one of those "customers" that ask you questions, but by the way they're asking, you know they actually know what they're doing, they just don't know it. So it's another 15 minutes of "yep... yep... yep...". Meanwhile I'm not getting work done I'm being paid for, doing work I'm not getting paid for, but worse yet, I'm aiding and abetting junk-peddlers?! Someone shoot me!

I could decide to charge them. I could throw down the classic bluff: "this is beyond the level of support we give here, but I'd be more than happy to support you outside of my time here for only $70/hr..." That should scare em off! But if it doesn't and they call my bluff, I'd actually have to pay more attention to both their problems and advice I'm dishing out.

But, yeah, I'd have $70. Dammit.

*(Note: Remind me to choke my employee tomorrow for not chasing them away in the first place.)

What to do in Maui?

This morning a colleague posted an open plea for ideas of what to do during her upcoming vacation to Maui, Hawaii. This reminded me of what great time I had when I went oh so many years ago! After sending off another one of my trademarked TMI email responses, I decided what the heck- I'll share it with the world as well!

DISCLAIMER: I haven't been to Maui since 2002- I don't know what may have changed since then, but all the quotes came from websites visited today.

Aloha xxxxxxxxxxxx! I typically don't go for the touristy type activities but I still remember playing the tourist role in Maui was one of the best vacations I've ever had. I've borrowed text from various websites that reflect my experiences in words better that I could come up with on my own. You should be able to get more details about any of them online.

Road to Hana
"The Road to Hana is world famous for the natural beauty of its unblemished landscapes and towering waterfalls. Maui is understandably proud of Heavenly Hana's successful fight against overdevelopment and the destruction of their Hawaiian culture. When you make the trip over to Hana Maui, you'll see why it's referred to as The Land That Time Forgot..."

Photo of Hana, Maui, State of Hawaii. Photo by Kanoa Withington 2006

Haleakala Bike Ride
"If you’re looking for a real thrill while on Maui, you need to try the most popular activity on the island... While cruising down Haleakala’s slopes, you’re able to see Maui in a different way than most. If you drive, you’ll miss out on a lot of views only seen in areas where a bike can stop (and cars can’t.)..."




Molokini Turtle Cruise
"Snorkeling at Molokini crater is truly a unique opportunity, as there are only 3 volcanic calderas including Molokini in the entire world. In this offshore, sheltered crater sanctuary, you experience clear, sparkling waters that only Molokini can provide, often boasting unlimited visibility. Over 250 species of fishes call the crater their home, making snorkeling at Molokini a rare, exotic adventure..."

Molokini by Collin Grady (www.flickr.com/collingrady)

Add caption

Sunset Dinner Cruise
"Maui is one of the most romantic places on earth, and nothing speaks of romance quite like a Maui sunset dinner cruise. The waters of Maui offer one of the best places to view the sunset, filling the sky with bursts of brilliant gold, soft reds, peach and warm oranges. Feel the warm trade winds. Feel yourself relax, and tension disappearing with the setting sun. Watch the sun’s great ball of fire sink slowly into the horizon. After the sun sets and the golden sky sleeps, gaze at the twinkling lights of Lahaina and Kihei, or catch a view of Haleakala as her peak disappears into a wreath of clouds..."



NOTE: I've purposely not recommended any particular companies because a) I don't remember, and b) that was 6 years ago. :)

Have fun!

Randomly Random Thought Of The Day

(Okay, I lied. This isn't that random)

I know I'm in the business of helping people, but sometimes I find myself thinking, "how the f*** did you manage to get into college?!"

iPhone Apps...

Recently I gave into inner and outer pressures and joined the iPhone toting masses. Now, not only can I think I look cool every time I pull out my phone, I can go broke slowly with one touch access to the 25,000+ iPhone Apps available on iTunes. Or so it seems...


In between putting finger prints on the iPhone, wiping them off, and trying not to be that guy who wants everyone to know he has an iPhone, I've been window-shopping the App Store the last few days. Without a "try before you buy"option for any of the apps, I don't wanna go too crazy, right? Much to my surprise, I'm discovering there aren't that many apps that pique my interest! I guess not being into video games helps. :)

A few apps I am thinking about downloading or think are interesting enough to talk about:

"A Faux Call" ...simulates an incoming call and gives u a tactful way to get yourself out of an uneasy situation" LMAO!! I certainly could have used this a few years ago!

"Voice Text Pro" ...the the only voice-activated text messaging app for the iPhone (i.e. voice to text). I can think of a few instances this could come in handy, but how do you make it type "kthnxbi"?

Facebook/MySpace/LiveJournal/Blogger/Wordpress - the iPhone versions of these popular sites/services.

After a few days, that's about it really. One of the forums I belong to has a whole discussion dedicated to iPhone Apps. Even pre-iPhone, only a few of the ones mentioned sound interesting to me. This should prove beneficial to the limited space of both my iPhone and bank account!

The truth is, 90% of what I want to do on my iPhone I can do without installing any of the apps- Text-messaging, email, photos, calculator, web... Did I mention it's a phone, too? Yeah, that's a good chunk of my personal needs. The only app I've actually downloaded is the Facebook app. For now. I'll keep you posted on the whole iPhone experience, specifically, whenever I come across an app that looks interesting enough for me to actually download.

Got any suggestions or reviews of must-have iPhone apps? Share them in the comments below!

Powned by a Belligerent User?

Most of the Support Tickets that reach my desk are about the same 4 questions, about 50 times a day. This obviously doesn't count when something actually breaks and our site goes down- then the number shoots up to about 50 times a minute!

Occasionally I'll receive a ticket that is so over the top, retarded, or hilarious that it gets passed around the department and IT support circles as comic relief. On even rarer occasions, a user uncovers a giant error or omission that we somehow overlooked. Quite a humbling experience when we get those!

Today was the first time that I got one that was all of the above- Hilarious, retarded, and humbling, all at once. So of course I have to share it- and my response, with you today!

Problem Description:
I am a Mac user, and it has come to my attention that neither Safari, Firefox, or even the most up to date version of Internet Explorer on Windows is supported by [your website]. I think that it is a shame that the tools that are necessary for properly functioning at [your company] won't work properly without extraordinarily outdated web browsers. I don't feel comfortable downloading internet browsers that haven't been supported since 2003 in the case of IE 5 and 2006 in the case of Netscape 7. It is my hope that this situation is rectified in the near future.

I read that and thought, "WTF kinda crack is this guy smoking?!" I began to carefully write a reply that was politically correct, informative and non-condescending. But it's pretty hard when you're dealing with idiots. Or is it? Read on my friend! My response:

Between the many students, faculty, and staff who having been using [our website] for several years, I am confident that all versions of Safari and Firefox, and Internet Explorer versions 6 and 7- function with no major problems (Between work and home, I personally use [our website] with Safari v2-3, Firefox 1,2,3, and Internet Explorer versions 6 and 7 on a daily basis). We have not received any feedback from users using Internet Explorer 8 yet. In writing this response it has occurred to me that you may be referring to the outdated FAQs we have on the website. This information has not been updated because ironically, once users stopped using the older versions of Netscape and Internet Explorer, most of the problems our FAQs address went away.

If you are having problems using [our website], any additional information you can provide regarding your problem will greatly assist us in addressing your issues. Specifically, any error messages received while trying to use [our website].

In the meantime I will encourage our staff to update the FAQ as soon as possible.

Could it be? Did we just get powned by a belligerent user? I hate it when that happens! He was using IE 5 to send that out so I don't know. At any rate, it's certainly time to update the FAQ!

New 24-inch iMacs and a Belated Prediction

Unless you've just come from under a rock, you've probably heard that Apple has upgraded its entire desktop line, including a newer, faster, 24-inch iMac. If you've never seen a 24-inch iMac in person, let me try to put this into perspective-

Here's a Hummer with 24 inch spinner rims:

Here is a Girl's' Dual-Suspension Mountain Bike with 24-Inch wheels:
Here is a 24-inch channel catfish:


Here is the world's biggest hamburger. Yep- its 24 inches across!


Here is a 5-piece drumset with 24 inch bass drum:


In short- 24 inches is HUGE! (two feet, to be exact). Who really needs a screen the size of two Subway sandwiches laid end to end? I use a 17" iMac on my desk at work and it works out just fine for day to day work-related tasks, which is about 50% email, 30% researching info on the web, and 20% Word/Excel. I rarely feel like I need more desktop real estate, but I rarely watch any video on it either.

At home, I use a 20" iMac. I often us it as my "tv" and watch fullscreen video, lounging on a sofa 12-feet away with no complaints. (why I have no TV is a totally different conversation!). The only time I pine for more desktop real estate is when I'm editing videos, websites, or photos, which is 75% of the time I'm in front of that computer.

My friend is a music teacher and semi-professional musician. He does a lot of composing and writing of sheet music which is how he justifies his monolithic, 24" iMac. Even next to his 32" LCD TV, the 24-inch iMac looks huge and slightly out of place. When he is using the computer like "normal" person (email, web-surfing, Facebooking, etc), about 50% of the 24-inches is wasted real estate.

However if you spend most of your computer time editing music or videos with programs like Logic or Final Cut, you really do need all the desktop real estate you can get (Final Cut Pro as shown below). Which is why the newer faster (same priced) 24 inch iMac is really a good thing, for the right person. But for the average emailing, web-surfing, Facebooking, YouTuber, 24-inches is a little over the top. About 4-inches, specifically.

(Above, a desktop computer using Final Cut Pro)

And now, the prediction! When the first 20-iMacs came in 2004, I predicted that the day Apple announces a 30" iMac, it will have a TV tuner and/or Apple TV built-in. Yep, you heard it here first!!

Crackheads. The good kind!

A co-worker brought some Crackheads to work today, and there was much rejoicing!

"Crackheads are white and dark chocolate covered espresso beans, and dang are they ever tasty! Each 1.3oz box has about 30-32 Crackheads inside, which packs a nice punch of about 200mg of caffeine per box. And 200mg of caffeine is a very sweet treat indeed." (@ thinkgeek.com)

Which is faster? kbps or Mbps?

I got this email today. Thought I'd share it for my loads of avid readers (even though, anyone reading this, probably knows the answer already).

"I have a dumb question..........which is faster kbps or mbps?..."

Kbps stands for "kilobits per second," while Mbps stands for "megabits per second" [note the proper capitalization]. These units of measurement address throughput or "bandwidth", which measures how much data can be sent from Point A to Point B in one second. (aka "internet or network speed"). Because one megabit is equal to 1024 kilobits, 1.0 Mbps is over 1000 times faster than 1.0 Kbps.

(Not to be confused with "kilobtyes and megabytes", which measures the actual size of data, which I won't get into.)

Yes, sometimes I give a little too much information. :)

MICROWAVE TERMS OF USE AGREEMENT

Because I needed to, and because I could not find an existing one, I wrote this "Microwave Terms of Use Agreement". Hopefully someone will find this useful.


MICROWAVE TERMS OF USE AGREEMENT

PLEASE READ THESE TERMS OF USE CAREFULLY. By using this Microwave (“Microwave”) you agree to the terms and conditions outlined in these Terms and Conditions ("Terms"). This Agreement supersedes all prior or contemporaneous agreements, representations, warranties and understandings with respect to the use of the microwave, and may be amended at any time by us from time to time without specific notice to you. The latest Agreement will be posted on the Microwave and you should review this Agreement prior to each use of the Microwave.

Limited Right to Use:
[Company] grants its employees and affiliates non-exclusive limited license to use this Microwave in accordance with these Terms and Conditions.

a) LIMITED USAGE GRANTED
You may use the Microwave at your leisure during normal hours of operation. You may not allow non-employees to use the Microwave at any time. You may, however, use the Microwave on their behalf, by way of proxy (in other words, you can put their items into the microwave), with the understanding that the same Terms apply regardless of ownership of the contents placed into the Microwave.

b) MODIFICATIONS
The Microwave shall remain in a clean state at all times. If, through the use of this Microwave, your items should spill, spatter, explode or in any way, leave any evidence of your use, you agree to clean it immediately. This includes both the interior and exterior surfaces of the microwave. If prior to your use of the Microwave and you see that someone has left it in an unclean state, you are required to notify Management as soon as possible. In the interest of good will as well as health concerns, you are requested, but not obligated to clean the Microwave yourself.

c) UNAUTHORIZED USE
You may not use the Microwave for any use other than its intended purpose. Please read product labels clearly regarding temperature, time, and containers approved for use in a typical consumer grade microwave. Non-food items, with the exception of containers designated for Microwave use, are strictly prohibited. [Company] grants its employees and affiliates non-exclusive limited license to use the Microwave in accordance with these Terms and Conditions. Non-employees may not use the Microwave at any time except under the conditions shown in section a) LIMITED USAGE GRANTED.

d) ASSIGNABILITY
If in the event these conditions are not met, Management reserves the right to revoke access to this Microwave without notice.

e) QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, AND NOTICES
These Terms of Use are governed by the de facto owner of the microwave, without respect to its conflict of laws principles, and the federal laws of the United States. Questions or comments may be directed to Management through the regular communication channels.





I made the "button" above, and taped it over the "Start" button on the Microwave. :)